The Top Ten Reasons You Should Publish A Lightly-HUME-orous Email Newsletter

Michael Hume - Word Play logo

October, 2021 * Volume I, Number 10

Dear Highly-Rated Reader,

Just when you thought it was safe to read your email, here it is: The latest edition of your favorite news-free newsletter, Word PLAY!

I know you’ve been as eager to see the latest rankings as I’ve been to share them with you. So here y’go!


Joking aside, THANK YOU for reading… for not opting out just yet… and for making Firewords Creative Copy your go-to source for the words that win and the funny that makes money. I am humbled by your support, and seriously grateful for your business.

- Michael

Michael D. Hume, M.S.
Senior Author and Selection Chairman
Firewords Creative Copy

Meanwhile, in this edition of Word PLAY...

The Top Ten Reasons You Should Publish A Lightly-HUME-orous Email Newsletter

Word PLAY… Playful Monthly Commentary
On Persuasive Copy For YOUR Business

This is the time of year when everyone’s attention is consumed by wondering what the latest rankings will be.

Who will be in the Top Ten? Who will be in the Top Four? Who will be in a dark hole somewhere, languishing in anonymity?

As for that last one, not you. You have a chance to be famous.

Well, at least, you have a chance to be known, liked, and trusted by your ideal prospects. And here’s how:

Publish a lightly-humorous, yet charmingly persuasive email newsletter once or twice a month!

You wanted rankings: Here they are, The Top Ten Reasons you should publish such an email newsletter (presented in old-school late-night-TV order, from tenth to first):

10. You’ll be cool if you do. All the cool kids are doing it.

9. As of this writing, nobody can tell you can’t publish a lightly-humorous persuasive email newsletter.

8. The best defense is a good offense, and the best offense is a good defense.

7. You can rest assured that they’ll find a way to get two SEC teams into the Top Four, every year. And if you publish a lightly-humorous persuasive email newsletter, you’re almost guaranteed to get one of those coveted playoff spots. You’ll be the SEC of your industry.

6. It costs almost nothing to publish an email newsletter… you just hit “send,” and out it goes. It’s not like old-school late-night-TV, which had to rely on bad jokes and mailing newsletters through the postal service.

5. Most people have social media. Most people watch TV or listen to the radio. Most people even get mail. But just about EVERYONE you know uses email. It’s the best way to reach your ideal prospects.

4. Your competitors don’t have the courage, the smarts, or even the charming good looks to publish a lightly-humorous persuasive email newsletter. They are too worried about their self-image, whereas you have no shame.

3. Okay, that didn’t come out right. What I meant to say was that, compared with your stuffy competitors, you take your business just as seriously but you don’t take yourself nearly as seriously. You have the confidence to publish your stuff with a sense of humor.

2. You know a writer who can pull it off! If you don’t, call me. I do.

And, finally, the Number One Top Reason You Should Publish A Lightly Humorous Persuasive Email Newsletter: Your readers will actually read it!

It’s true. My clients are finding that their lightly-HUME-orous email newsletters are opened and read at about two and a half times the rate they’d get with “the usual stuff.”

If you have all the business you can handle already, then by all means, stop marketing. All the experts say that’s the smart thing to do. After all, next year at this time, the SEC will still dominate the rankings, and you will have all of the same clients giving you all of the same business. Right?

Well, actually, you should probably keep the pedal to the metal on your marketing, since you can’t count on SEC-like favoritism. You want next year to be even better than this year, right?

So publish an email newsletter. And, for best results, keep it lively and fun-to-read.

Ten solid reasons like these can’t be wrong!

Key Take-Aways From This Edition

  • The SEC gets special favoritism from the selection committee. Yawn.
  • Fun-to-read email newsletters get about 2.5 times the readership your competitor’s boring stuff gets.
  • Your main competitor has no gumption.
  • Late-night TV hosts used to present Top Ten lists in reverse order. It’s true, kids. You’d have no way to know this, since all you see on late-night TV these days are bad jokes and political stuff (sorry to be redundant there).

Want more brilliant take-aways? Just you wait… the next edition of Word PLAY! Is just a month away!


Discussion Questions

  1. 1
    Did you ever receive a snail-mailed newsletter from a late-night TV host?
  2. 2
    Who do you think will end up in the Top Four (playoffs) in college football this year? Extra credit if you can pack your Top Four with 100% SEC teams
  3. 3
    Do you really have any legitimate reason not to publish a lightly-humorous persuasive email newsletter?

Send your answers to The most creative, inspirational response will be eligible to win a PRIZE! *

(* Prize is at the sole discretion of Michael Hume, his heirs and assigns, the SEC selection committee, and a panel of retired late-night TV hosts who understand the power and value of Top Ten lists. This month’s Grand Prize is pretty cool, but it’s unlikely to make the playoffs. Still, it’s worth getting your entry in before the deadline, which is quickly approaching, as far as you know. Boring, lackluster, or unimaginative entries will have no chance of making the Top Ten, and may be relegated to the bottom left corner of your competitor’s boring snail-mailed newsletter. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Literally, nobody ever reads that corner. So send in your best work! Best of luck.)

Last Month’s Grand Prize Winner: Karen P. of Morrison, Colorado topped the crowded field of entries with a submission which read, in part, “I think 1,427,212 laughs per year would be an excellent use of my time.” We all feel that way, of course! So call before midnight tonight to claim your prize, Karen. As for the rest of you, keep entering. You may well make the playoffs.

Not yet subscribed to Word PLAY? (HORRORS!)

I write HUME-orous marketing copy for happy clients who take their professions very seriously… but whose customers like and trust them because they don’t take themselves too seriously. Want more info? Get in touch…

Call me: (303) 478-8702
Email me:
Investigate me:
Rank me: 195 South Rancho Vista Drive, Pueblo West, CO 81007

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Copyright 2021 by Michael D. Hume, M.S. All rights reserved.
Word Play – is a proud sponsor of the most popular worthy cause.
FireWords Creative Copy, 195 South Rancho Vista Drive , Pueblo West, CO 81007, United States

Michael D. Hume, M.S.

Michael Hume is a freelance writer, singer, and songwriter, and author of The 95th Christmas. He's an honor graduate of the Defense Information School, and holds an M.S. from the University of Colorado School of Business. Michael is the author of hundreds of online articles, including the popular series Great Leadership Requires Inspiration, The Conscience of a Restorationist, Appreciate Your Adversaries, and Take Care of Your Business.

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